Depression

     Depression is seen as a "phase" or a "stage" to some people. To others it is seen as a side effect of a medication. But for many it is something they have to live with all of their life. Depression is one of those issues where people say, "I am so sorry" then continue on with their life. It is hard for those without depression to understand those with it. The reason it is so hard is because it doesn't make any rational sense. Who would choose to be upset and negative all the time? It's not caused by a logical response. It can be caused by a number of things. May it be a chemical imbalance in the brain, or a side effect of a medication you are taking. Depression is no laughing matter.
     So what do you do to help those around you who are depressed? Well, who knows? Each case of depression is different. Some people are able to go on depression medication (which, ironically, can sometimes have a side effect of depression).  Other people aren't on medication. It is a hard world to navigate.
     This world is made even harder to navigate by the stigma that surrounds depression. Depression is a serious medical issue. Up to 15% of those who are clinically depressed commit suicide.  Over 15 million adults (18 and older) are depressed. If the issue is this big, then why is it not made a top issue?
     I think the reason is that it is not a big issue is because it is hard to talk about. Men aren't supposed to have feelings let alone talk about them. Depression brings vulnerabilities to men that they can't escape from. Women don't have it much better either. Their depression gets shrugged off as them being "overly emotional" or "it's their time of the month".
    We bring this problem upon ourselves because many of us are afraid of reflecting inwards. If you think confronting your inner demons is hard, imagine adding a chemical imbalance in your brain on top of that. Its terrifying for most people. But it is also hard to talk about because no one wants to admit they have depression. Those who are depressed will put on a happy face and walk around without anyone else ever knowing. How could someone who smiles be depressed?
     There is a lack of knowledge about depression. It is getting better though. High schools are starting to teach about the dangers of depression and ways to "prevent" it. There is no surefire way to "prevent" depression, only ways to manage it.
     Depression is a serious issue for all of those involved. Family, friends, loved ones, all of them are effected when someone in their life is diagnosed. To those without depression, I sympathize with you as well. It is a hard ordeal watching them on the outside. To watch someone who was once so full of life now look like an empty husk of their former self is heartbreaking. But what can you do? I guess my only advice would be to be there for them. They don't want you to go over the top. You don't need to by expensive gifts or read help blogs. They don't want you to list all of the ways the homeopathic remedy you found could cure depression in monks in Tibet. Rather, just be there for them. Listen to them, talk to them, include them in your experiences.
     It is hard for everyone involved. I get that. It is easier to do nothing. It is factually 100 times easier to do nothing rather than to do something. That much is true. But it is so much less rewarding. So my next message is for those without depression who may know someone who is struggling.
     You mean more to those around than you may know. And although you may feel like you have to "fix" their situation, know that this is not true. They don't want to be fixed. They may be depressed, but they aren't broken. It isn't your job to fix them. It is your job to be there for them. It doesn't have to be big, and it doesn't have to be a grandiose act. But it has to be meaningful. Create a lasting relationship with those around you. And although there is not going to be instant gratification, know that they will appreciate you for everything you do.